Obedience

I can't believe my last post was on the 10th. I swear this month has just flown right by me! I am not really even ready for Xmas, but am I ever?

My kids went to bed early tonight. (Thank you Jesus) Autumn has been extra whiny lately, I think it's because she has a cold and just needs some rest which is hard to get in this house! Ben is driving me crazy with Xbox. How does a 3 year old boy become addicted to Xbox? He just started playing, maybe 3 weeks ago? Maybe it was longer then that, I don't know, but ever since he started playing it he doesn't stop. He could sit there all day! It started bothering me, and I mentioned it to Kevin and he said, "ah, he'll get sick of it" Well, unfortunately he is NOT getting sick of it. I realized how bad it was today, when two times he didn't even bother to get up to go pee in the bathroom, he just went in his pants! That's a good sign right there it needs to be controlled better. I took the controllers away and told him enough. He cried. I feel bad but he's too young to be playing xbox all day long. Anyway!

Since I last posted I think I have learned some interesting things. It amazes me that I have been a Christian, or so I thought a true christian for about 4 years, and I've done many bible studies, but some things just didn't quite "sink in" until now. I don't know why things work that way? God has really been working on my heart about obedience in the past few weeks. Have I heard of being obedient to God before? Of course! Was I? Um, no. Did I subconsciously choose to ignore the fact that if I am born again I need to be "out w/the old self"? I'm not even sure but lately it seems that every book or piece of paper, or blog I read, or sermon I listen to is about being obedient to Jesus. If I want to have a close relationship with God and feel his peace and Joy, I need to be obedient. What a concept that is. :) I almost feel stupid that it took me this long to get it!

I'm not just talking about eating either, that is another lesson I have learned lately, I'll get to that in a min! But I'm talking about anything! I have NOT been putting God, or what God wants first in my life for many things. I almost feel like in the last few weeks, my brain has been overloaded with information. . God really was teaching me things!

As for my eating goes, this is what I've soaked in so far from the book(s) I'm reading and meeting with Diane and just what God has told me!

For my entire life, I've been dieting & exercising, I'd lose the weight, look good, feel good, then fall back down and go back to my old habits. Always looking for something to fill that hole, that nagging feeling inside that I "need" something, oh it must be food! (uh, no Amy, it's God you air head) But I always went straight to food for my temporary fix. Thing is, it never worked! I'd feel good while I ate, then a 1/2 hour later I'd be looking for something else to eat. Why?? I was trying to fill a void I had in my life, but the problem was, I was filling the void by sinning, which in turn was taking me FARTHER from God, and giving me LESS peace and joy! Why didn't I see this? All those times I dieted, and then went back to eating again, I was falling down, over, and over, and over because I was trying to lose weight for the wrong reasons!

1. I was looking for MANS approval, not Gods. Will others think I look good? Will they tell me after I lose weight how good I look?

Well, I've learned that I am not supposed to care what MAN thinks of me! Only what GOD thinks.

2. I was doing it by myself. Without God, trying to do it with my own "will power" which never worked!

I finally am getting this. First of all, it doesn't matter what I look like to other people, I shouldn't be looking for their approval. I should be looking to God for his and IF I was being obedient to GOD and doing things HIS way, I wouldn't be eating so much and the by product and blessing of that would be the weight coming off, and never coming back, because I am doing to to please God not for man! Hallelujah! I feel like a veil was lifted! I will never keep any weight off unless I am doing it for the right reasons!

So, I have to say, since this revelation, it's been getting easier! HE is helping me! Who would have thought? lol. Do something to please God and he'll help you! (he'll even go as far as making the food at my favorite restaurant not taste as good as usual!) I'm sure some of my seasoned Christian friends are thinking, well duh Amy! lol. That's OK though, I have a sense of humor about how long it takes me to "get" things. Thank the Lord for people like Diane who can explain things to me more then once until it clicks!

I am excited about my new knowledge and closer relationship with Christ. I am not by any means saying it's easy for me and you can expect me to be thin soon. :) It's still hard. I still want to go to the fridge or snack pantry many times a day, and some times I do, but I have to use the self control God is giving me to say no to the food, and Pray to him! When I do that, he helps!

Anyway, I am very happy that he is working on me and my heart and changing me to be more like him. I feel better about things already, my attitude shows it and I feel closer to God (not to mention have a better relationship with my husband) which is such a blessing!

Speaking of blessings, (sorry Kevin but I have to share this) My husband has recently accepted Christ! A few years ago he wasn't so sure he believed the bible, or that Jesus was the son of God but he now believes! That is an answered prayer and such an awesome one. I am happy to say that I have a God fearing husband! The funny thing is, he didn't even bother to share this with me. Like for me, when i got saved, I was excited! I was hungry for God and couldn't get enough information. My husband is just so laid back he didn't even bother to tell me. I asked him what he wants for Christmas and he says, "what more could I want then the gift that Jesus died for my sins?" I about fell off my chair! Then later driving in my van, I cried! God is good! Kevin has been listening to the bible on tape in his truck to and from work. I knew this, but didn't know the effect it had on him. So praise God! God is doing some major work in the Vander Galien household!

Well, I think I am going to go enjoy a cup of tea (thanks Chris!) and read a little bit in peace and quiet and then go to bed early for once!