About You

You are LOVED by God. There is nothing you can do, or can't do to make him love you more or less. He loves you because he loves you. Because you are His child.

More then your past
Worth it
A treasure
You matter.

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Uncommon Vessels

I was reading this book this morning and it had a lot of parts that I want to remember and keep fresh for awhile so I am going to put them here. Mostly for myself!

Idolatry= the worship of a false God.
God's children are commanded in Exodus 20:3-5 to have "no other Gods" and although no one actually worships or prays to food, there is a definite connection between the need for communion with God and peace with him and the satiating of that need with food. When anxious or fearful, you may eat instead of praying or waiting on God.

When you are experiencing emptiness and feel the desire to eat, you need to put GOD first, rely on his strength, and feed on HIM.
Ask yourself, "What am I feeling?" and "Do I feel true physical hunger or some sort of empty restlessness which is a craving for something other then food?"

The flimsy and futile attempt to obtain pleasure from food, especially sweets, is frustrating at best. You must be taught reliance on the righteousness of Christ and reliance upon his joys and pleasures instead of food.

The proper course of action is prayer and reliance on Christ through support of other Christians, bible reading, and learning to trust solely in him to meet all of your needs.

You can stand in the presence of God with boldness, not because you have kept to your diet successfully, but because God, in his mercy, has chosen you and redeemed you.

You should learn to acknowledge points of disobedience and sin and must confess and repent of them, asking and accepting forgiveness. The repentance involves a change in behavior- more than saying "I'm sorry" - a true effort must be made to change actions and even motivations, all the time relying on the grace and strength of the Lord.

For the moment, all discipline seems painful rather then pleasant; later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it. (Hebrews 12:11)

Sunday, December 28, 2008

I am FREE!

I hate to say this, but I am glad the hustle of Christmas is over. We had a very nice Christmas, and yesterday we had another Christmas with Kevin's side of the family which was also really nice but I am glad it's all over with. I honestly think that for once in my life, I was sick of shopping! I like to shop, but I was just plain tired of running around, especially last min. It's very stressful sometimes. I love getting together with family, and I wish we did it more often, but without all the stress of presents and cleaning and cooking! I'd be happier with a pizza delivery and a somewhat messy house. My kids are enjoying their Christmas presents, they got Wii and have been having fun playing with it. Jake finally got his xbox live hooked up and can now play video games with his friends and talk through a head set without even having to get together. I'm not sure that's a good thing! Our poor Gracie has been sick through the holidays. Autumn and Ben both have the cough, and Jake has it a little bit, but Grace got hit hard. She has been miserable for days and I feel so bad for her. All she wants to do is be held. Even in the night, laying next to her is not good enough, she wants to be laying on my chest. Poor thing.
One cute/funny thing that she says when she doesn't feel good is "boom". Probably because anytime she falls down or gets hurt we say did you go boom? So now she must think if she's hurting or sick, it's "boom". So she feels her face, when it's hot and she has a fever and she says "boom". It's just too cute. I think this year being closer to the Lord Christmas felt different to me. Shopping for presents was more stress then fun, doing Santa was not FUN at all. We used to give Jake quite a few presents from Santa, this year we only did two a child. If it were up to me it would have been zero from Santa. lol. I guess it's just bothering me more this year. Kevin's idea of picking a different day of the year to do presents is sounding more and more appealing to me! How about an August celebration? lol.
I thank God for sending his son to die for me, and this year I remembered more then an other year to say Thank you to Christ for his gift of salvation and the phrase "saving me from my sins" has much more meaning to me this year then it ever has. Jesus didn't just die on the cross to save me from hell, but he also died to save me from my sins when I'm alive! I never really quite "caught" that until just recently. I've been learning so much through my eating addiction. My eating issues are sins. But Jesus died so that I don't have to have this sin in my life. I don't HAVE to have an eating addiction. Why did it take me this long to go to the Lord for this? I am AMAZED at what he is doing in my life with my eating since I figured out that I will ALWAYS fail by myself and I need HIM! Since I've given this over to him, he has taken away a lot of my desire to eat! I can eat a half a cookie! Or ONE slice of pizza! I can go hours without thinking about food. I feel different. He has changed me. He is delivering me from this sin. I am so very thankful for this. It's almost weird to think like a "normal" person when it comes to food. I have never, ever in my life felt so free from food before. God is SO good. Of course I am praying every morning, and during the day that he helps me with my eating, that I don't eat too much, that I know when to stop, that he gives me strength not to eat when I know I'm not hungry. He has answered my prayers. He is faithful to me because I have given it to him! Today's sermon was a good one at church too, the high school Pastor Don Mingo gave the sermon and I thought he did a great job. He has a way of explaining a story in the bible that it seems like your there. Almost everything he said today, I was shaking my head up and down, thinking yes lord! It seems it all related to what is going on in my life and how God is working in my life. I will post a link to the sermon when it's up on the website. But one of the things I had a big Amen to was when he said God rewards those who sincerely seek him. ( "and without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him") SO true! He has rewarded me, and released me from the chains of a food addiction! Praise God. I know in my heart that if I stay close to God, and keep my relationship with him strong by studying the bible and praying, he will continue to help me with my eating. I'm also sure that he is working on me in other areas of my life! I hope that someday he will use me, to help others to know him by my actions, the way I live my life. I want people to look at me and see Christ! I want people to want what I have and have the opportunity to share Christ with people and share with them how he has saved them from their sins!
So thank you Jesus, Happy Birthday to you and thank you for dying so that I can live and be free!
I am free!
Through you the blind will see
Through you the mute will sing
Through you the dead will rise
Through you all hearts will praise
Through you the darkness flees
Through you my heart screamsI am free
Through you the kingdom comes
Through you the battle's won
Through you the price is paid
Through you I'm not afraid
Through you there's victory
Because of you my soul sings
I am free
[Repeat Chorus]

Sunday, December 21, 2008


I HAVE to share this post. I just wrote about 10 min ago in my blog how everywhere I look God is talking to me about obedience. I got done writing and clicked on a friends link on my page, and here is what I find!
Put on-put off which is one of hers that I read days ago but it hit so close to home.
Is God amazing or what?


I can't believe my last post was on the 10th. I swear this month has just flown right by me! I am not really even ready for Xmas, but am I ever?
My kids went to bed early tonight. (Thank you Jesus) Autumn has been extra whiny lately, I think it's because she has a cold and just needs some rest which is hard to get in this house! Ben is driving me crazy with Xbox. How does a 3 year old boy become addicted to Xbox? He just started playing, maybe 3 weeks ago? Maybe it was longer then that, I don't know, but ever since he started playing it he doesn't stop. He could sit there all day! It started bothering me, and I mentioned it to Kevin and he said, "ah, he'll get sick of it" Well, unfortunately he is NOT getting sick of it. I realized how bad it was today, when two times he didn't even bother to get up to go pee in the bathroom, he just went in his pants! That's a good sign right there it needs to be controlled better. I took the controllers away and told him enough. He cried. I feel bad but he's too young to be playing xbox all day long. Anyway!
Since I last posted I think I have learned some interesting things. It amazes me that I have been a Christian, or so I thought a true christian for about 4 years, and I've done many bible studies, but some things just didn't quite "sink in" until now. I don't know why things work that way? God has really been working on my heart about obedience in the past few weeks. Have I heard of being obedient to God before? Of course! Was I? Um, no. Did I subconsciously choose to ignore the fact that if I am born again I need to be "out w/the old self"? I'm not even sure but lately it seems that every book or piece of paper, or blog I read, or sermon I listen to is about being obedient to Jesus. If I want to have a close relationship with God and feel his peace and Joy, I need to be obedient. What a concept that is. :) I almost feel stupid that it took me this long to get it!
I'm not just talking about eating either, that is another lesson I have learned lately, I'll get to that in a min! But I'm talking about anything! I have NOT been putting God, or what God wants first in my life for many things. I almost feel like in the last few weeks, my brain has been overloaded with information. . God really was teaching me things!
As for my eating goes, this is what I've soaked in so far from the book(s) I'm reading and meeting with Diane and just what God has told me!
For my entire life, I've been dieting & exercising, I'd lose the weight, look good, feel good, then fall back down and go back to my old habits. Always looking for something to fill that hole, that nagging feeling inside that I "need" something, oh it must be food! (uh, no Amy, it's God you air head) But I always went straight to food for my temporary fix. Thing is, it never worked! I'd feel good while I ate, then a 1/2 hour later I'd be looking for something else to eat. Why?? I was trying to fill a void I had in my life, but the problem was, I was filling the void by sinning, which in turn was taking me FARTHER from God, and giving me LESS peace and joy! Why didn't I see this? All those times I dieted, and then went back to eating again, I was falling down, over, and over, and over because I was trying to lose weight for the wrong reasons!
1. I was looking for MANS approval, not Gods. Will others think I look good? Will they tell me after I lose weight how good I look?
Well, I've learned that I am not supposed to care what MAN thinks of me! Only what GOD thinks.
2. I was doing it by myself. Without God, trying to do it with my own "will power" which never worked!
I finally am getting this. First of all, it doesn't matter what I look like to other people, I shouldn't be looking for their approval. I should be looking to God for his and IF I was being obedient to GOD and doing things HIS way, I wouldn't be eating so much and the by product and blessing of that would be the weight coming off, and never coming back, because I am doing to to please God not for man! Hallelujah! I feel like a veil was lifted! I will never keep any weight off unless I am doing it for the right reasons!
So, I have to say, since this revelation, it's been getting easier! HE is helping me! Who would have thought? lol. Do something to please God and he'll help you! (he'll even go as far as making the food at my favorite restaurant not taste as good as usual!) I'm sure some of my seasoned Christian friends are thinking, well duh Amy! lol. That's OK though, I have a sense of humor about how long it takes me to "get" things. Thank the Lord for people like Diane who can explain things to me more then once until it clicks!
I am excited about my new knowledge and closer relationship with Christ. I am not by any means saying it's easy for me and you can expect me to be thin soon. :) It's still hard. I still want to go to the fridge or snack pantry many times a day, and some times I do, but I have to use the self control God is giving me to say no to the food, and Pray to him! When I do that, he helps!
Anyway, I am very happy that he is working on me and my heart and changing me to be more like him. I feel better about things already, my attitude shows it and I feel closer to God (not to mention have a better relationship with my husband) which is such a blessing!
Speaking of blessings, (sorry Kevin but I have to share this) My husband has recently accepted Christ! A few years ago he wasn't so sure he believed the bible, or that Jesus was the son of God but he now believes! That is an answered prayer and such an awesome one. I am happy to say that I have a God fearing husband! The funny thing is, he didn't even bother to share this with me. Like for me, when i got saved, I was excited! I was hungry for God and couldn't get enough information. My husband is just so laid back he didn't even bother to tell me. I asked him what he wants for Christmas and he says, "what more could I want then the gift that Jesus died for my sins?" I about fell off my chair! Then later driving in my van, I cried! God is good! Kevin has been listening to the bible on tape in his truck to and from work. I knew this, but didn't know the effect it had on him. So praise God! God is doing some major work in the Vander Galien household!
Well, I think I am going to go enjoy a cup of tea (thanks Chris!) and read a little bit in peace and quiet and then go to bed early for once!

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

He's amazing me AGAIN.

I have to blog about this right now while it's fresh in my mind. I have been struggling the past few days with my relationship or should I say my closeness and love for Christ. Just have questions and as my friend Karen put it, "growing pains".

He showed himself again to me this morning two times.

First of all, from doing this blog and reading others, a women, from church, strong in her faith made a few comments on my blog, she found my blog through someone Else's blog. I since emailed her, and we just started talking, which was a blessing in itself. The thing that hit this morning and I knew was just not "coincidence" was this.

Since I started volunteering at middle school ministry, I met this sweet high school girl, who helps out w/the middle school kids. I have been amazed by her faith, and that she takes time in her life to work with the middle school kids, being she is in high school. I recall one day asking her where she went to school and she said " I am home schooled right now" I remember thinking I would love to meet her mom sometime. We have been talking about splitting our group on Wed night because it's getting to big, and the plan is that I would lead and Hannah will help me.

This morning I found out that the sweet women who I have become friends with through her commenting on my blog, and now emailing me IS Hannah's mom! ( I'm quite sure God has had this planned all along and I'm just figuring it out now)

Secondly, this morning I was in the shower. Praying that God help me with my struggle with food, help me to know how and when to start laying down my food for him because I have no desire to do so.

I come downstairs and pull out the binder for tonight's middle school ministry teaching, and what is the first thing I see? This paragraph-

"Procrastination isn't just a problem when it comes to getting our homework or our chores done; it affects how we follow Christ. Jesus wants us to follow him NOW.

I laughed! (and then I cried!) God has been showing himself and how close he is in my life a lot lately. He is really doing some chiseling away at me these days. Praise God. I'm so glad he's working in my life, in my heart, and changing me to be more like him. What a wonderful thing that he loves me so much.

Last night I heard this song on the radio and thought it was the most appropriate song for me right now......

It's called "Undo" by Rush of fools. Here's the lyrics..

Rush Of Fools - Undo From the album Rush Of Fools

I've been here before, now here I am again

Standing at the door, praying You'll let me back in

To label me a prodigal would be Only scratching the surface of who I've been known to be


Turn me around

pick me up

Undo what I've become

Bring me back to the place Of forgiveness and grace

I need You,

need Your help I can't do this myself

You’re the only one who can undo What I've become

I focused on the score, but I could never win Trying to ignore,

a life of hiding my sin

To label me a hypocrite would be Only scratching the surface of who I've been known to be


Make every step lead me back to The sovereign way that You
So today starts a new journey for me. I'm sure I will have much to blog about in the coming days.

Saturday, December 6, 2008

My church

Just a quick praise for my church. I feel so blessed to have Fox River as my home church. I just find so much joy at church I honestly can't think of any other place that that I almost always leave with a good feeling in my heart. I can be in the worst mood, stressed, crabby, sad, whatever, and when I leave those doors I feel better.
This morning I had two things going on at church. I had my first meeting with Diane about my eating issues and then the church was putting on womens luncheon so I also attended that.
Meeting with Diane just started my day off reminding me that I am not expected to be perfect, or to become a perfect Christian over night. Just because I have failed at things in the past doesn't mean that I will fail at them forever. That God works in our life in HIS time and his timing is the right timing. There's a reason why I fail at things and I need to just get back up and try again. I am not saying that this is a license for me to fail, or not to TRY but just not to be so hard on myself when I do fail. At the same time, Rachel (the speaker) hit my heart when she was talking about what Christmas is really about, and how she was in a shop with her sisters, a place full of ornaments and she was searching the store for a nativity scene and she couldn't find one anywhere, and the more frantically she looked, she finally found one, on a BOTTOM shelf, all dusty, and by itself. Her voice was cracking as she talked about it. She said she got teary in the store and her sisters couldn't understand why she was so sad. Jesus was the best most important gift that anyone could ever accept/receive, but people tend to put him on the bottom shelf and let him get dusty. Me included. It seems I go through stages where I am very close to my God and then times when I get busy and don't make time for him in my life, and put him on the shelf. (Then I realize that my life is pretty crummy and remember, oh yeah! I haven't been spending time with my Lord!)I don't want to do that. I'm glad she brought it to my attention because during this season it's SO easy to get so busy with shopping and cleaning and stressing about holiday meals, that we forget what we are celebrating in the first place! My husband said one day after he read my blog about not wanting to "do" Santa that we should just not do gifts at all. Just pick a different day of the year to do gifts, and on Christmas just celebrate Christ! Have a birthday party for Jesus and that's it, so our kids understand what Christmas really is. At first I thought that was absurd, how would we get away with that when everyone else is exchanging gifts and talking about Santa? But the more I think about it, I kinda think it's not such a terrible idea! But everyone else in the family and the world for that matter celebrates Christmas with presents, and get togethers and meals so how do you just change that with your own kids? On Friday Autumn came home from school and reminded me that Santa comes tonight. I thought, oh great now the teachers talk about St. Nick coming too. perfect. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE Autumn's teacher, so I am not making this comment about her, it's just what if I don't want to celebrate the fat man? What if I want my kids to know if something ends up in that stocking it's from their parents not some made up man? Now I"M the one that's going to disappoint her if I tell her there is no Santa. Because everyone else tells her there is. I don't know why this all of a sudden pulls at my heart more this year then any other. Jake is now 12 and knows Santa doesn't exist, but when anyone says anything to my other kids about Santa I just feel myself cringe inside. I don't know what that feeling is? Well, I got off subject here. I've been interrupted about 15 times since I sat down here so I guess I'm just losing my concentration! This is why I try to wait till every one's in bed to write in my blog, but by then I'm so exhausted I fall asleep instead! lol.
Bottom line I wanted to blog about today was that I really love my church and my sisters in Christ, and spending time there with the people that are trying to be more like Jesus. I had a nice morning and thankful for my church. Guess I'm off to be a mom (aka, taxi driver).....

Monday, December 1, 2008

Thanksgiving......Ends with a blast......

My house is a complete disaster at the moment and I really should be cleaning it up before I go to bed,but I have got to make some time to post about this years thanksgiving because I don't want to forget details of it later on. It was a nice thanksgiving. My sister and her husband came over to my house in the morning and put the Turkey in, (because they are the cooks of the family) and I just basted and watched it cook and did the small things like potatoes and dessert. My dad didn't come this year, it was Jane's side of the family's turn for him so we didn't have the pleasure of having dad around, but our small gathering was nice. My brother Keith said the prayer before dinner and he did such a fabulous job. You can tell when someone is praying from their heart, not just spewing out words so they can eat. He meant what he said and it was touching. (love him!) So of course we ate till we were stuffed and enjoyed each others company. After everyone had left, Kevin and the kids and I decided that we would have our first fire in the fireplace in this house. Kevin went out and got some wood and started getting the fireplace ready, and I was getting drinks ready for us all in the kitchen. As I'm standing in the kitchen, I hear this big "POOF!" sound, and then Kevin yell something. I knew something bad happened. Kevin came around the corner and his hair looked like Einstein. Sticking up everywhere and all burnt. The house was quickly filling up with smoke and the fire alarm started to go off. Then the security system alarm started going off. The kids were freaking out, crying and Jake couldn't breathe because of his asthma so he was crying and went outside, smoke was going out our windows, (why didn't any neighbors hear or notice this?) At that time we figured out the flu (flute?) whatever it's called, was not open, so that explained the blast. Kevin had went downstairs to turn the gas on (it was turned off due to putting a fireplace in the basement recently) so by the time he came upstairs the fireplace was filling with gas and had no where to go but out when he lit the lighter! So instead of the gas and flames going up they came right at him. Our fireplace is real log burning, but a gas start. So he rushed to turn the gas off, but we still had burning logs in there and didn't know how to get hands in there to get the flu open! I was about ready to call the fire department and Kevin got it open with some fireplace tool. (Thank God!) After getting that open, I called my sister and told her, we need to take Kevin to the hospital. Thankfully she lives close by and jumped in her car and came over (thanks Cindy!) Kevin ended up spending the night in the hospital. I don't think I've ever seen the ER work so quickly! They had him in a room and yelled "trauma something or another" over their speaker and we had like 4 people in the room within minutes! I was impressed. He has second degree burns on his arm, hand, face. After 3 injections of Morphine in his IV he was finally feeling some relief from the pain. Needless to say, I had to come home without my husband that night. They made him stay. They actually wanted him to go to the burn center but he said no. The next morning Gracie was walking around saying, "Daddy owdie!" (owie) She is so sweet. His arm is looking pretty bad, he had a huge, and I do mean huge blister on the top of his arm that popped yesterday. I wish I had taken a picture of it. (Grace called that a bubble. (Daddy bubble!) It's isn't looking pretty but he insists that he doesn't "need" to go to a follow up appointment with a burn doctor. (typical Kevin!) So hopefully nothing will get infected and he will heal OK without scarring. It's awful this happened to my husband on thanksgiving, it really is, and I feel bad for him that he has to deal with this and it keeps him from doing things, but the blessings are that none of my children were near that fireplace when that flame came flying out of there. I can't imagine one of our babies going through what their daddy has gone through in the past few days so I am praising God that my sweet kids are safe. I am also thankful that Kevin didn't get it worse then he did, our house didn't burn down because if anymore gas would have built up in there I'm sure it could have been MUCH worse, so I know God was watching over us that night.
I have SO much to be thankful for this Thanksgiving, and everyday for that matter. We are blessed with four healthy children, I have a husband who loves me, a sister and brothers that live close that I can see often, My dad visits often and we have a great relationship, a beautiful home, wonderful neighbors, many friends, honestly what don't I have to be thankful for?! The lord has been very gracious to us. As someone at Walmart said to me one day as I was shopping for primer, "We are not worthy!" God is so good to us, and I need to keep that in mind more then one day a year. Everyday is a day to praise him and thank him for what we have. Well, Kevin is starting to clean up, (which is an odd thing at this time of night) so I had better get up and help before he decides to quit. Happy Thanksgiving it is...........