Reminders to obey

I have a sheet that I wrote on the other day, reasons why I need to obey what God is telling me to do. This morning I added a little bit to it when I was doing my morning bible study.

Just now I sat down to read some of my emails and came to my proverbs 31 devotional for the day.

She talked about how we see yellow ribbons tied to things to remind us of the military that are fighting for our country and to pray for them and how in Numbers 15 God tells Moses to tell the people to make tassels for their clothing and hang them by a blue cord so that they remember and obey all his commands instead of following our own desires like we are prone to do.

This fits right in with everything in my life right now, once again, God speaks! I was reading this morning how our will follows our thoughts and desires. So if we desire to please God, Our will tends to follow that. If we desire to please ourselves, then our will follows that. It's not that we need more will power, but we need to change our thoughts and God needs to change our desires.

I do want to please God, and at the same time, selfishly want to please myself. I think with my eating, a lot of times I'm putting things in my mouth before I even stop to think about God or what I am desiring when I eat the food. I was thinking this morning, where can I put this piece of paper so that every time I go to eat something, I look at it? Then I get the devotional.

Maybe I don't need to carry the piece of paper around with me. Maybe I can just tie something around my wrist to remind me of what it says on that piece of paper before I go to put something in my mouth.

I just love days when I can just see God all over the place speaking to me.

Step by step, becoming like his son.

Maybe I'm a slow learner, more then likely though, I'm learning just as God wants me to learn. As my friend Diane says, "step by step".
Last week I was called to fast. At first I didn't know it, but the thought kept coming into my mind over and over. As much as I didn't want to do it, I finally decided that is what he wanted me to do. What I thought it was all about was to help me get off the junk food and get moving on eating right. Maybe that was PART of it, I'm not entirely sure, but as I started the fast, I got my OWN ideas. I wasn't even sure how long I'd be fasting, I was going to wait for God to tell me when to stop. By day 3 I had my ideas of going off the fast with vegetables, then starting fruits, then starting meats and eating all healthy and perfect. I'm quite sure these were MY ideas and rules but didn't know it at the time. I did the fast for 3 1/2 days, then broke it with carrots as I planned. I emailed Kevin at work asking him to stop on the way home for some the ingredients to make vegetable soup. Well, he didn't come home until after 6. By then I had already given in to a craving of pretzels. Then I ate what I was making my kids for dinner, a taco. So much for eating vegetables an fruits. I had blown it already. I was not happy with myself. Having a pity party. What is wrong with me? I'm weak. It's true. I am weak, no doubt about that. But two days later when I saw Diane she reminded me that maybe the only eating vegetables and fruits was not God's plan or idea but mine. I think she was right. She reminded me that I am like a child, and you can't expect a child to go from first grade to high school in a day. That God takes us step by step. Maybe I didn't make an overhaul in my eating in those three days, but God did teach me something. He taught me that I am able to resist food. I didn't eat for 3 1/2 days! I find it VERY difficult to choose healthy good foods over junk. That is a huge problem I have. I also like to snack when I'm really not all that hungry, just for pleasure, and God doesn't like that.
Anyway, I guess the point of that all is God asked me to do something and he helped me do it. I was able to fast when he asked me to fast. He was there with me to help me along, and if I'd just give up the junk food for him, he'll be there with me to help me through that too. But will I do it? I don't want to. Why? Because I enjoy eating junk food. So what does that mean? It means that I am putting junk food before God. I am telling myself, and GOD that I'd rather have the junk food then him. How sad is that? The thing is, I know it, and God convicts me of it, and I hate that fact that I am choosing a stupid food that isn't even good for me over the GOD of creation. But I have a really hard time controlling it, I say one thing, then do another.
This morning I was doing my bible study on the book Idols of the heart and it brought me to Isaiah 26. This is what Verse 10 says - "Though grace is shown to the wicked (me), they do not learn righteousness; even in a land of uprightness they go on doing evil and regard not the majesty of the Lord. "
That's exactly what I am doing. I just go on sinning and not bother to think about our holy God.
At the bottom of my study bible the explanation for verse 10 says this~ "Even wicked people receive God's benefits, but that doesn't teach them to do what is right. Sometimes God's JUDGEMENT teaches us more then God's good gifts. If you have been enriched by God's goodness and grace, respond to him with your grateful devotion."
I AM receiving his grace right now, he is being patient with me, even though I am being absolutely ridiculous. But this also gave me back my healthy fear of God. He is loving, but he is also capable of making me pay for being so disobedient. I already have the consequence of being heavy for eating the junk food. But God could allow something worse to happen to me. This prompted me this morning to make a list. It's not real long, but it's a list to look at when I decide that I am going to eat something junky.

Why should I be obedient with my food?
1. Because he commands it, and God's ways are best.
2. Because I don't want to receive his judgement/wrath or for him to allow something else to happen to me because of my bad eating habits. (healthy fear of God)
3. Because he has given me Grace as a sinner, he is patient and loving to me, teaching me and giving me chances to "get it".
4. Because he loves loves me and he only wants what is best for me.
5. Because I love him. I owe him.
6. He is God. God of everything, everyone, the great I AM. Who am I not to be obedient to him?

I know I can't be perfect, but I should sure be giving it more of a shot. I feel blessed that he cares enough about me that he convicts me about this time and time again. I do grow weary of this entire food problem and really just want to throw in the towel some days and say forget it. This is just too hard and I am happier just eating junk and being fat. But he reminds me- get back up and try again Amy, he still loves me.

Trusting or Doubting

We had a sermon this Sunday about doubting God. It was a good sermon, but I think it spoke to me a bit differently then It might have spoke to others.
Maybe I'm wrong but I think our Pastor was gearing it towards new believers. That it's ok to doubt christianity or God sometimes, and ask questions because that is how we learn. Same for Christians that have been believers for a long time. Sometimes we doubt, so we should ask questions and get the answers. That doubting doesn't make us bad Christians. I agree with that. But in some cases, especially mine right now, I needed to stop doubting God and move on and be obedient so that I can see that he is faithful. I needed to just take a step out in faith and obey so I can see that God can do better. Not that I am making him prove something, just that I didn't even give him the opportunity to show me that there's better through him because I wasn't trusting him.
Thanks to my Friday morning bible study I was reading Joshua this morning and the story of the Israelites crossing the Jordan.
God wanted the Israelites away from all the sin and Idolatry so he led his people to the promise land. He parted the sea so they could get away from the people who were living in sin. When I really think about what a site this must have been, for everyone, it amazes me. But God does that for me today. He moves things out of my way, he opens my eyes to things, tells me when to move away from things that will cause me to sin or will tempt me. He's doing it for me just as he did for the Israelites back then, I just have to notice that he's doing it!
In the story for God to part the Jordan the priests had to be the first to step into the Jordan river carrying the ark of God, the river was at a flood state at the time. So it wasn't just a still, motionless river to step into, it sounds more like a raging river that you could be swept away in. The priests had to have FAITH that they would not be swept away. They took a step out in faith, and God parted the Jordan so they could pass through.
There is something written in my bible, at the bottom that explains to the reader what some passages might be trying to say. for vs 13 and 14 it has a comment that says this, " Often God provides no solution to our problems until we trust him and move ahead with what we know we should do. What are the rivers, or obstacles in your life? In obedience to God, take that first step"
This was a perfect story for me to read this week. I will share more in days to come what I am dealing with but in the past days God asked me to take a step out, to move on something and have faith and trust him that he'll be there. That what he has is better for me, If I am obedient and trust him, I did that, and this story confirmed to me that I am doing the right thing. I love how he reaffirms things sometimes. I've had people ask me, how does God talk to you. This is one of the ways. He talks through his word.

God is faithful and sometimes we have to stop doubting him and start believing him.

You shall have no other God's.

This is the most important commandment, yet probably also the most looked over, even by Christians, myself included.
God has really opened my eyes lately to this commandment.
There is SO much more to having another God then what people think. Having another God doesn't just mean worshipping a God like Allah, or making little statues to worship. Other "God's" can be as simple as pleasure. That's right, pleasure can be a God to you. Something that you love, something that you'll sin to get. Worship doesn't just mean bowing down to something. It means it's so important to you that you love it.
Something becomes an "Idol" when you love IT more then God. A few months ago my eyes were opened that food was an idol to me. I didn't think I could live the rest of my life with the thought that I may never be able to eat chocolate or cake again. That is exactly WHY it was an Idol to me. If you think you can't live without it, it's an idol, (another God to you).
In the book Idols of the heart she says something that impacted me. She says , "Disobedience springs from the worship of other God's". How true that is. I wouldn't be over eating if I wasn't worshipping food. If I was like my kids, and could care less about food, and only eat when I am told to. (Oh how I wish I will be like that someday!)
God has expanded my wisdom a little further now to understand there are SO many more idols (Gods) then just food for me. Pleasure happens to be another one. I would bet that pleasure is an idol in the majority of people's lives. Most people probably have no idea that it could be a God to them either. We live in such a self centered world, that everyone is always looking out for themselves, and worried if they themselves are happy, how could pleasure not be a God? That's the way the world is. Unfortunately a lot people live by the worlds ways/expectations instead of living by God's. When we become a Christian and accept Jesus as our savior we are called "born again" we are called to "put off" the old person, expected to be a new person and live in the spirit. We are to die to self. That means that self is not number one anymore. It's a hard concept to grasp because the world doesn't look at it like God does. When I get mad at my kids for making a mess, I'm really mad deep down because I have to clean it, and that takes "ease" and "pleasure" away from me. Interesting. So if I act in sin and get angry at my children (or husband) it's because I'm being selfish and thinking about my own pleasure instead of loving others and thinking about theirs. Not saying that I should allow my kids to be pigs but I have to look at WHY I get mad or upset sometimes, more then likely it's something selfish in my own heart. Another God. There are many more things that are God's to us and I'm sure in the coming days God is going to show me more of my idols that I need to get rid of and put him first. I pray that he does show me more because I don't want things like that coming between me and my father, this also helps me to love God more, because I realize more and more how much I don't keep the commandments, and how undeserving I am of salvation. When you use the bible as a mirror for your life it really helps you appreciate what Jesus did for us.